As featured on p. 218 of "Bloggers on the Bus," under the name "a MyDD blogger."

Monday, May 24, 2004

Blogging Bush's speech

He really sounds like a 3rd-grade teacher talking to children, which of course is not just what he thinks of us, but what he thinks of himself.

Then he talks about Saleem and Nick Berg, playing up the terrists angle. "Fanatacism not caused by any action of ours." Then he puts out the discredited claim that Zarqawi wielded the sword. Wasn't he supposed to have one leg, and doesn't the killer in the Berg video have, you know, two?

Iraq is now the central front in the war on terror... yeah, thanks to you!

Talks about how the elite guards merged into the civilian population. You threw them out! Don't you remember de-Baathification?

Then, more stay the course crap.

The infrastructure-building is a duck to make it look like we're staying there to be good guys. In fact, it's just to legitimize keeping military personnel in country.

Democracy in Iraq will begin like this... we'll pick a leader, keep control of the military, and stay as long as we want.

We'll maintain 138,000 troops "as long as necessary". "Our nation appreciates their hard work..." and the fact that they stand in for rich people like me. Followed by the requisite troop applause line.

He just pronounced it "Sa-damn," like his daddy used to!

"Our soldiers have treated religious sites with respect..." you know, like mosques we've blown holes in, or wedding parties.

"Iraqi forces will serve under an Iraqi chain of command..." that we train and we approve.

Here comes the UN invocation. It's another cover, to show that we can play nice with others. You know, this whole speech is not a look at what we will do in Iraq, it's a laundry list of what's been done, spun in a positive way. With the occasional talk of evildoers or how bad it was under Saddam. You can't have your plan be "It was bad before." That's not a plan. It's impossible for this President to think more than two minutes ahead.

A hideous stumble on the word "Abu Ghraib." That was ridiculous. It's only been in the news for a month. He said it a different way three times! Wow, that could be a knockout punch. Talk about out of touch.

He's on the fifth step, thank God, that means it's almost over. They're drafting a NEW constitution? Didn't we already draft one? I remember reading a Naomi Klein article about how there would be no legitimacy under the current one, it's so rife with American involvement.

"We're not an occupying power. I sent troops to Iraq to make its people free..." because that's the only rationale that works now.

And of course, September 11 had to get mentioned. Because it's so obviously a propos.

"It is a tragedy of history that in the Middle East, so many have been held back by lawless tyranny..." especially in Saudi Arabia, our ally for 60 years.

OK, I'm done.