Marked Man

One day after a grenade is thrown at the President during a speech in the Republic of Georgia, the White House and the Capitol are evacuated. Because of a Cessna off-course, mind you, but evacuated, and I'm sure the Beltway reporters that had to breathlessly ¡run for their lives! will now report how Dear Leader protected them and kept them safe.

Only "Elvis" Bush had left the building:

President Bush was not in the White House at the time of the incident, officials said. They said he was out on a bicycle ride at the Patuxent Wildlife Research Center in Beltsville, Md. Vice President Cheney was in the White House and was evacuated in a motorcade, then returned after the all-clear was given.

It's the middle of the day, in the middle of the week. The President had been in Europe for the past several days.

He's on a friggin' bike ride?

Of course, the real story here is missing. What was he listening to on his iPod? I'm sure Elizabeth Bumiller will chime in with the story as soon as she stops crying and, through tears, thanking the Leader for his courage.