Immediately the best show on television

Kudos to The Colbert Report. Everything about it was letter-perfect, from the self-aggrandizing set (the shot of Colbert in front of the picture of himself in front of the picture of himself cracked me up) to the bombastic "love-it-or-leave-it" rhetoric ("We got Chewbacca!") to the "I'm in love with myself" tone of its host ("Did you see my Emmy?") to the Stone Phillips v. Colbert "gravitas-off". Some think the incessant O'Reilly parody will wear out its welcome, but there's so much material there that's ready for satire. These talking head, celebrity-driven "opinion journalism" cable news shows have been around for a long long time without anyboy batting an eyelash. Colbert lays them to waste with hilarious results. Even though he stumbled a little, he's bound to only get better. And this monologue hits the nail on the f'in head:

Anybody who knows me knows that I am no fan of dictionaries or reference books.  They're elitist for constantly telling us what is or isn't true, what did or didn't happen...

I don't trust books.  They're all fact and no heart.  And that's exactly what's pulling our country apart today.  Because face it, folks, we are a divided nation...  We are divided by those who think with their head, and those who know with their heart.  

Consider Harriett Miers.  If you think about Harriett Miers, of course her nomination's absurd!  But the President didn't say he thought about this selection, he said this:

President Bush: "I know her heart."

Notice that he didn't say anything about her brain?  He didn't have to.  He feels the truth about Harriett Miers.  And what about Iraq?  If you think about it, maybe there are a few missing pieces to the rationale for war.  But doesn't taking Saddam out feel like the right thing...right here in the gut?  Because that's where the truth comes from, ladies and gentlemen...the gut.

Did you know that you have more nerve endings in your stomach than in your head?  Look it up.  Now, somebody's gonna say `I did look that up and its wrong'.  Well, Mister, that's because you looked it up in a book.  Next time, try looking it up in your gut.  I did.  And my gut tells me that's how our nervous system works.  

Now I know some of you may not trust your gut...yet.  But with my help you will.  The "truthiness" is, anyone can read the news to you.  I promise to feel the news...at you.

Earlier in the year I had an outside chance on working on what would eventually become "The Showbiz Show with David Spade." At the time it was supposed to air right after The Daily Show. When I heard Colbert got the spot instead, essentially putting me out of a job I really wanted, I thought, "Oh well. I can live with Colbert after Stewart anyway." He reinforced it last night. I've never been so envious in all my life.