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As featured on p. 218 of "Bloggers on the Bus," under the name "a MyDD blogger."

Thursday, December 15, 2005

The Capitol in Wartime

Finally, Congress is getting down to the business of fighting the war.

Not the War in Iraq, mind you. On the War on Terror. No, the War on Christmas is the one that concerns them.

This afternoon, 26 House Republicans -- together with the GOP leadership -- will be forcing the full House to vote on whether House members support the "symbols and traditions" of Christmas, and whether they disapprove of the utterly mythical "attempts to ban references to Christmas." Today's roll call vote comes on the heels of a House floor debate held last night regarding H. Res. 579, a resolution "Expressing the sense of the House of Representatives that the symbols and traditions of Christmas should be protected." During the debate, Democratic members asked the Republican author of the resolution, Rep. Jo Ann Davis (R-VA), if she would permit the symbols of Chanukah and other holidays to be included in the protection of the resolution -- and she refused.


This is a "sense of the House" resolution, which means it is nonbinding and devoid of any legislative meeting. But it's certainly taking up time on one of the last Congressional days of the year. That seems aprropriate, doesn't it? Wow, what a complete sellout to the radical fundamentalist wing, to push the made-up, unimportant War on Christmas into the halls of Congress. Crazy.

By the way, let's thank our lucky stars for 50-year Democratic stalwart John Dingell, who read this poem on the House floor today:

'Twas the week before Christmas and all through the House,
    no bills were passed `bout which Fox News could grouse.
    Tax cuts for the wealthy were passed with great cheer,
    so vacations in St. Barts soon should be near.

    Katrina kids were all nestled snug in motel beds,
    while visions of school and home danced in their heads.
    In Iraq, our soldiers need supplies and a plan,
    and nuclear weapons are being built in Iran.

    Gas prices shot up, consumer confidence fell.
    Americans feared we were in a fast track to ..... well.
    Wait, we need a distraction, something divisive and wily,
    a fabrication straight from the mouth of O'Reilly.

    We will pretend Christmas is under attack,
    hold a vote to save it, then pat ourselves on the back.
    Silent Night, First Noel, Away in the Manger,
    Wake up Congress, they're in no danger.

    This time of year, we see Christmas everywhere we go,
    From churches to homes to schools and, yes, even Costco.
    What we have is an attempt to divide and destroy
    when this is the season to unite us with joy.

    At Christmastime, we're taught to unite.
    We don't need a made-up reason to fight.
    So on O'Reilly, on Hannity, on Coulter and those right-wing blogs.
    You should sit back and relax, have a few egg nogs.

    'Tis the holiday season; enjoy it a pinch.
    With all our real problems, do we really need another Grinch?
    So to my friends and my colleagues, I say with delight,
    a Merry Christmas to all, and to Bill O'Reilly, happy holidays.
    Ho, ho, ho. Merry Christmas."


Amen.

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