I Am Running For President On The Connecticut For Lieberman Ticket

I would like to officially announce that I am seeking the nomination of the Connecticut for Lieberman Party for President in 2008. At this time I feel like the Connecticut for Lieberman Party offers me the best chance of winning.

Connecticut for Lieberman is a small but growing movement. Just yesterday we were nothing; literally, yesterday, we were nothing. Now we have representation in the US Senate, more than the Greens, the American Independents, the Reforms, and the Libertarians. I'm thinking of calling myself a Liebertarian, it rolls off the tongue easier. But for now, I'm a Connecticut for Lieberman and I'm running for President.

I have a unique strategy to win the Connecticut for Lieberman nomination. I'm pulling up my staff in 49 of the 50 states. I will not go to Iowa, or New Hampshire, or Nevada, or South Carolina. I'm putting all my resources into Connecticut, where the Connecticut for Lieberman Party is strongest. If I win there, it'll be on to the convention (are they having a convention? Hmm. OK, it'll be on to Lieberman's house) for a floor battle the likes of which you've never seen.

I stand for the values all Connecticut for Liebermans stand for. We believe in ending the war in Iraq... as long as it's within 3 months of an election. We believe in the firing of Donald Rumsfeld... in the course of a camapaign where we need to appeal to a certain cross-section of voters. We believe that we stopped the dangerous scheme to privatize Social Security... except we flirted with it for longer than anyone in politics. We believe that our party can reach across the aisle - not the Democratic side, but the Republican side (that reminds me, what part of the Capitol will Connecticut for Liebermans sit? Probably in the aisle) - to achieve the kind of results Republicans want for the country. We believe in democracy, as long as Connecticut for Lieberman wins the outcome of that democracy. In fact, if I lose the nomination for President, I plan to run in the general election on the dday for Connecticut for Lieberman ticket.

Also, we hate the crude things they say on the teevee and the Internets and stuff.

I also believe in building the vast Connecticut for Lieberman-wing conspiracy infrastructure. I mean, we don't even have an animal symbol yet, and I hear the ass is taken. Maybe we can use a part of its anatomy...

You can join me in this fight. I have started an exploratory committee called dday for Connecticut for Lieberman for America (DFCFLFA). Your donations at this early stage will help me win the nomination in 2008. I think my chances are very good. Besides, I hear the other politician in the party is a real loser.

UPDATE: My new party has a website!