Crying To Keep From Laughing

The Pajamas Media imbroglio is so karmically just that I have to agree with James Wolcott when he says, "Were there a men's cologne on the market called Schadenfreude, I'd be judiciously dabbing some on right now, savoring its woody musk."

Let us part the beaded curtains of time. It was only a few years ago, November of 2005 to be tiresomely precise, that Pajamas Media held a launch event at Rockefeller Center's Rainbow Room heralding the arrival of a superstar group blog on steroids that would wipe out the old traditional media like so many thatched huts. The keynote speaker for the opening festivities was Judith Miller and a bevy of online semi-demi-celebrities were there for the free eats and photo ops. Such heady times those were, spiked with romantic fantasies of riches in store for those visionary enough to hitch their wagons to the Yahoo of blogs, copiloted by those crazy dreamers Roger L. Simon and Charles Johnson. Those of us unswayed and unimpressed with this bagpipe brigade of B-listers were accused of being threatened, even jealous, of these saucy upstarts with a sound all their own. In a gonzo fantasia written by Protein Wisdom's Jeff Goldstein, I was gooily portrayed as a mincing, porcine sis [some scrolling is required] who was 86'd by hotel security after crashing the festivities in warblogger drag. Too busy having fun at the expense of Pam Geller's thumb fiesta, I took no offence at Goldstein's labored gags (or the acclaim they received from his confederates), letting karma to take its natural course.

And wah-la, as Kaye Gibbons' Ellen Foster would say.

Ass. Kick. Curb.

I'm sorry, but it's just brilliant to watch these triumphalists fold back on themselves, with all the petty insults and jealousies bubbling to the surface. Roger Simon, unable to get advertisers to pay for the ramblings of Pam Geller and Glenn Reynolds, now thinks he can get viewers to pay $15 to $37 bucks A MONTH for them to watch the above talk to one another.

Dear (Sucker),

As you know, last September Pajamas Media began a new initiative in Internet television called Pajamas TV. When we started with our RNC coverage from Minneapolis, we noted that we would be in a Beta Phase through the first quarter of 2009. In the last few months we have strengthened the PJTV lineup with shows covering Media Bias, Education Bias, Middle East Update, Sharia and Jihad, Powerline Report, Ask Dr. Helen, Hugh News, Poliwood, Conservatism 2.0, Economy and Finance, National Security, and others.

As the end of the first quarter approaches and we near the production phase of Pajamas TV, we will continue to build our emphasis in this area. As a result we have decided to wind down the Pajamas Media Blogger and advertising network effective March 31, 2009. The PJM portal and the XPressBlogs will continue as is.

Since our ad relationship continues for the time being, you should note that in order to be paid for the 1st quarter of 2009, you must leave the current Pajamas ads up until 12:01AM April 1. We will be sending you information in mid-March on removing the ads. As of April 1, 2009, you will be free to arrange syndication or re-sale deals.

We thank you very much for participating during the formative years of Pajamas Media and we look forward to working with you in other ways. One of those is, of course, Pajamas TV. If you have any ideas in that regard, please do not hesitate to contact us.

Our best wishes in the new year and again our deepest gratitude for your participation in Pajamas Media.

Sincerely,

Roger L. Simon
CEO, Pajamas Media

Money line: "PJM’s new hope is PJTV, a pay video site. Where you can pay to watch Glenn and Helen Reynolds. This is not unlike asking people to pay to be punched in the face."

Seeing certifiably crazy people react to the news that they won't be getting their wingnut welfare checks anymore is just pure blogger bliss. But even more hilarious is how Simon tried to set it right:

Actually that part of our business has been losing money from the beginning, so the people getting their quarterly checks from PJM were getting a form of stipend from us in the hopes that advertisers would start to cotton to blogs and we could possibly make a profit. Didn’t happen. No wonder those people are kicking and screaming now that they are off the dole. I might too. [What's their beef? I thought most of them were free marketeer libertarians or something.-ed. Go figure.]

Good people skills.

This demise was inevitable, but it's beyond fun seeing these self-important maniacs take out the claws on each other in the process. Which continues to the end:

50. Sissy Willis:
Good night, sweet prince. Don’t let the bitter ones get you down.

Yes, good night, sweet prince. Good night.